Communities Can't Stop
Communities Can't Stop
Old and new, they're everywhere.
My family used to own the coolest rug of all time, one that I’m sure is familiar to many of the fine readers of this very blog.
It had a city laid out on it, complete with roads, shops, and even a fire station. I loved to place Matchbox cars down on the streets and move them throughout the community.
Even after we had thrown the super awesome rug away (thanks, Mom), I still would lay out complete cities with Matchbox cars on my family’s dining room floor. I’d spend hours creating different scenarios, like parades or emergencies. Anything that brought all the different cars together.
I was so young that I couldn’t really comprehend it at the time, but these hours with my toy cars were my first real interactions with the concept of community. And, communities have come to define my life. I’ve found that they’re everywhere, big and small, and each have unique characteristics that make them special.
Last week, on my road trip from Albany, NY to French Lick, IN, I got to make a special stop in Philadelphia.
It’s really been 12 years?
I entered my cousin Mimi’s house to an endless stream of hugs, handshakes, and smiles. There was a huge amount of Korean food that had been prepared for my arrival and numerous family members all trying at once to engage me in conversation.
I wanted to talk to them as well and hear about their experiences, as it had been 12 years since I’d seen any of my Korean family that lives in Philadelphia. As I inhaled spicy pork, kimchi, and a wide variety of Korean noodles, I got to recount stories and provide in-person updates on me and the lives of my immediate family.
My elderly great aunts even commented that I “have a good voice,” which may be the most flattering compliment I’ve ever received.
I spent a lot of time in the back of my family’s store, called “Mr. Cigarette,” and saw my cousins serve a never-ending stream of customers. They literally never take a day off, opening 16 hours a day every single day of the year. Their hard work pays off though, as they have great relationships with the area’s residents and have a thriving business.
I had the chance to meet my cousin Mimi and her husband George’s daughters for the first time, as they’re both in preschool. They reminded me what it is like to look at the world through a young child’s eyes, encouraging me to realize the full capacity of my imagination whenever possible. Far too often, I find myself caught up in the stresses of the world, so it was so nice to take a step back for a couple of days and embrace the fun of coloring and the games of “restaurant.”
I also spent a few hours meandering through Philadelphia proper, and considering my love for American history, I was like a kid in a candy store. I took my second-ever visit to Independence Hall, which is an extremely special place to me personally because it’s where my grandfather truly started his National Park Service career.
He served as a ranger at the park for almost a decade before being transferred to the Carl Sandburg Home National Historic Site, and he and my grandmother always regale us with stories of their time in Philadelphia. I also made an extra-special visit to the house they inhabited in Philly, just a couple of blocks north of Independence Hall.
I didn’t go in (the whole “breaking and entering” thing will inflict fear in you), but it was nice to take a few moments and reflect on all that has shaped me before an imposing thunderstorm drove me to an overpriced coffee shop a few streets over. '
It’s safe to say that I was exceptionally happy in Philadelphia.
My main takeaway was that despite not having seen any of this family for 12 years, there was still an inherent connection that only family can provide. They have been and will be steadfastly in my corner for my entire life, and I know that I will support them just the same.
I can guarantee that it will be less than 12 years before I get back to the City of Brotherly Love.
In French Lick, I’ve been able to see the power of community among people who (for the most part) aren’t related
This week, I’m staying at an AirBnB with Alyaa, Olivia Benzin, Cassie Porter, and Cassie’s mom Diane. Oftentimes, when players don’t receive free host housing through the Epson Tour, they lodge together to cut costs.
Up to this point, I’d only ever split housing with Alyaa, so it has been neat to further confirm my observations of a strong community, despite the competition, that I saw during the numerous rain delays of my first week caddying earlier this summer.
Whether it’s watching the players figure out a book exchange or joint laughter as we play the game “Sequence,” the people and the relationships are necessary and serve to re-energize and refresh from the grind of tour life.
I’ve also had the chance to see the caddie community in full force. A dinner invitation to my friend and fellow caddie Alex Velar turned into a “come play golf” text with Alex and five other caddies.
This was so much fun. It was a stress-free and fun-filled evening that culminated in us playing the last four and a half holes as a sevensome. We had a friendly competition and enjoyed the splendors of hitting the golf shots, which we don’t typically get to do due to the nature of our jobs.
On the first hole, I almost drove the green and then hit my approach chip to two feet for a relatively easy birdie. I was met with remarks of, “he shows up five minutes ago and takes all of our money.” I was sure to let them know that my play would only decline from there. While I double bogeyed the next hole, my team did finish in a tie for first.
Besides Alex, the other five caddies were the significant others of the player that they loop for. I got to share a cart with Ryan Shuttlesworth, Fernanda Lira’s husband, and I learned more about his life and the dynamics of his job, which is inherently intertwined with that of his and Fernanda’s relationship.
Ryan finds the work fun and often convenient as he and Fernanda cut costs by traveling together. They also get to spend valuable time together as a family, which is not the same for most players on tour, especially those from overseas, like Fernanda.
This was a terrific discussion away from the tournament, where the stresses of preparation and the logistics of life on tour melted away among the trees lining French Lick’s “The Valley Links Course.”
Communities are what define us
These moments over the past week have further confirmed to me the importance of human connection. We need the cultures that we create and the support of other people to experience our own successes.
As much as we often want to do things alone, there are no great things that we can accomplish by ourselves.
Those statements are all extremely cliched, but they’re true.
If I’ve learned anything this summer, it’s that the people that we surround ourselves with and the communities we find ourselves part of influence us in manners that we won’t ever fully fathom.
Our communities are there to celebrate with us when we experience life’s successes and give us hope when we’re in life’s doldrums. They shape us.
This is especially true of communities we’re directly in for just a few weeks, like my summer with the Epson Tour. I’ve still got one tournament to go, so there are many things I’m yet to experience and lessons that I haven’t learned quite yet.
However, I know that what I’ve seen and heard so far this summer will be with me for the rest of my life.
And, hopefully, I’ll have an exponential amount of golf and golf-adjacent experiences that I’m able to share with others in the years ahead.
For now, though, my focus is on the French Lick Charity Classic
It’s my final first round on the bag for Alyaa Abdulghany. We’re off at 4:40 pm ET with Minji Kang and Heather Lin. Appropriately, we’ve already had a multi-hour fog delay. There are just some things you can’t change.
The Epson Tour is going to try live streaming this tournament, after the live-streaming debacle in Michigan there’s no telling how this will go. If you’re able to figure it out, here’s the link: 2023 French Lick Charity Classic Livestream
As always, here’s the live leaderboard: 2023 French Lick Charity Classic Leaderboard
Catch y’all on the flip side!
Questions, comments, ideas, and feedback can be directed to jpatterson@unc.edu. You can find me on Twitter @JakeWPatt or my Instagram @Loopers_Line. If you really want to get to know me, check out my LinkedIn.
Thank you to Bethany Phillis for serving as my creative project mentor and to Caroline Maness for designing Looper’s Line’s logo.